Monday Magic in December

What would make higher education wonderful in 2019?

Money Money Money Money

Free college is now a reality in nearly 20 states
https://www.cnbc.com/2018/12/14/free-college-is-now-a-reality-in-nearly-20-states.html

"Free" community college is great marketing, questionable economics
https://www.sfchronicle.com/business/networth/article/Free-community-college-is-great-marketing-13485544.php

A Guarantee of Tuition-Free College Can Have Life-Changing Effects
https://www.theatlantic.com/education/archive/2018/12/life-changing-effects-free-college/577831/

Cooper Union financial crisis and tuition protests
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cooper_Union_financial_crisis_and_tuition_protests

Facing Enrollment Declines, Colleges Seek Out New, Creative Ways To Make Money
https://www.npr.org/2018/12/13/676534628/facing-enrollment-declines-colleges-seek-out-new-creative-ways-to-make-money

https://www.nacubo.org/Press-Releases/2018/Average-Freshman-Tuition-Discount-Rate-Nears-50-Percent

A Fifth of Private Colleges Report First-Year Discount Rate of 60 Percent, Moody’s Says
https://www.chronicle.com/article/A-Fifth-of-Private-Colleges/245092

Northern New Mexico College offers deal on classes to older adults
https://www.krqe.com/news/news-briefs/northern-new-mexico-college-offers-deal-on-classes-to-older-adults/1665004411

65 or Older? In Texas, You Can Go to College For Free
https://www.texasstandard.org/stories/if-youre-over-65-years-old-in-texas-you-can-go-to-college-for-free/

Wear a Christmas sweater for free admission to TJC basketball
https://tylerpaper.com/sports/college/wear-a-christmas-sweater-for-free-admission-to-tjc-basketball/article_fe13d940-f823-11e8-bbd5-4722d5095175.html

23 WAYS TO EARN EXTRA CASH FOR CHRISTMAS
https://thecollegeinvestor.com/17164/23-ways-to-earn-extra-cash-for-christmas/

two years

Today is the second anniversary.

Johns Hopkins continues to lead in research spending among the nation's universities [baltimoresun.com]

The flava:
Johns Hopkins University spent more than a billion dollars more on research and development than the next big spender among research universities to top the National Science Foundation’s annual list for the 39th consecutive year.

The article:
https://www.baltimoresun.com/business/bs-hs-university-research-spending-20181217-story.html

Does your school have a meaningful mission? Do you?

Do you have a vision for what you do?

It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year (the algorithm needs help) [from Wombat of the Copier]

I could get through email more efficiently if the text prediction were a little tighter. I need it to check the calendar, and screen for ".edu" endings, then give me these auto-complete one-tap options throughout December:

1. "That's irrelevant." 
2. "No."
3. "It's too late."
4. "I can prove you're lying; please don't make me."

--Wombat of the Copier

Allen Iverson describes being a 19-year-old college student entering the Villanova Pavilion to play a game [theplayerstribune.com]

There were four men, making some noise way up in the stands. And they all had on handcuffs….. and chains..…. and orange jumpsuits. Those kinds of orange jumpsuits. And I remember the sign they were holding up — clear as day. It said:

ALLEN IVERSON: THE NEXT MJ

But then it had “MJ” crossed out. And they had markered in “OJ.”

You have to understand….. I mean, I’m a grown man, now, writing this. But at the time??? I was 19. That’s near a child’s age. And it’s not like I was embarrassed about my past, or about where I came from — NEVER that. But on the same token, it was just, like, Damn. Damn!! Can your boy start fresh, like, ONE time?? Can I just go to college like a normal kid, and play some ball? I’ll tell you this: there isn’t a luxury in the world like being carefree. All these people, they’ll be out here chasing money, and happiness, and this that and the third. But there’s nothing on this earth better than carefree. And that’s the one thing that I realized some of these people out there were never going to let me be.

And what made Coach Thompson so special is he knew that, man. He knew that. Coach knew……. and he could see my heart just sinking in that moment. He knew he couldn’t protect me from everything that was in this world.

But he sure tried.

Here’s what Coach Thompson, MY coach, did for me on that night: He didn’t ask for their sign to be confiscated. He didn’t yell and shout and make a scene. No. See, what Coach did is he calmly walked over to us, player by player, and told us that — don’t worry about our things — we were leaving the floor. That’s it: We were leaving the floor. No big drama. Heads held high. We were there…. and then we were gone.

And then once we were off that floor, and it was just Coach back on the court? He calmly told those refs, he said, “Hey, no disrespect. No disrespect to y’all. But here’s what’s going to happen: If you don’t get those four pieces of sh*t outta here, and I’m talking immediately — we’re gonna be forfeiting this game. Understood?”

They understood, man.

Source:
https://www.theplayerstribune.com/en-us/articles/life-and-times-of-allen-iverson

How's finals week going? [a micro-playlet with Dr. Jekyll and Prof. Hyde]

Prof. Hyde:  Say, Jekyll, how is your finals week going?

Dr. Jekyll:  The only thing that keeps me sane is laughing at the ridiculousness of some students.  Here, I created what the young people call a "meme" to illustrate.

Prof. Hyde: I guess that's why they call him "Scumbag Steve".

big hungry

Have you ever gone out on a limb to help a colleague who is facing devastating challenges?

For safer schools, we need more hugs, not more guns [by Andre Perry]

The flava:
"The problem isn’t that schools aren’t safe enough, but that students don’t feel secure enough in school communities. Emotionally healthy, well-adjusted youth don’t tear through their classrooms armed with weaponry. And we can do our part in keeping schools safe by giving out hugs like candy on Halloween, helping kids feel a sense of belonging, of welcome, and making them feel safe enough to seek help when they need it. (Of course, we can also do our part by making guns harder to access, but that’s a whole other column.)

"This feeling of security is what the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) calls “school connectedness,” which it defines as “the belief held by students that adults and peers in the school care about their learning as well as about them as individuals.” When students feel more connected to school, the CDC says, they are more likely to engage in healthy behaviors and succeed academically."

Source:
https://hechingerreport.org/for-safer-schools-we-need-more-hugs-not-more-guns/

Stanford to go 100 percent solar by 2021 [Stanford press release]

"A new solar generating plant – Stanford’s second – announced today, will enable the university to use 100 percent renewable electricity in three years, more than two decades ahead of California’s goal of a carbon-free grid by 2045."

Applications to Michigan State drop after Nassar, sexual assault scandals [ESPN]

The flava:
Undergraduate applications to Michigan State University fell by 8.3 percent over the past year amid the scandal involving former Spartan physician and associate professor Larry Nassar and the school's handling of sexual assault allegations involving athletes.

MSU's applications for the fall of 2018 dropped by about 3,000, to 33,129 -- a contrast to rising higher-education applications nationwide and among most of MSU's peer institutions in the Big Ten Conference.

Ahead of the Nassar sexual assault allegations first appearing in the media -- in an Indianapolis Star article in 2016 -- applications to the university had increased steadily for seven years, according to an enrollment report released in October. But applications for fall 2017 showed a 3.6 percent decline.

The article:
http://www.espn.com/espn/otl/story/_/id/25430618/applications-michigan-state-university-drop-larry-nassar-sexual-assault-scandals-espn-lines

Harvard University sued over single-sex club crackdown [BBC]

The flava:
A number of sororities and fraternities filed lawsuits on Monday challenging a policy Harvard adopted in 2016.

Under the policy, students who join single-sex clubs cannot receive endorsement letters from college deans for postgraduate fellowships.

Harvard said the aim was to help end practices of exclusion at the school.

The article:
https://www.bbc.com/news/world-us-canada-46431278

"Politics does not have to be mean." --GHWB

mild-mannered moe from the midwest submits an apparently true article.

This is not from The Onion.


Hockey Pucks to Fight Shooters on Campus
// Inside Higher Ed

Oakland University, in Michigan, is distributing hockey pucks to faculty members and some students for use against active shooters on campus, The Detroit News reported. The idea is that a puck is legal to carry, could cause real damage and be a distraction.

--mild-mannered moe from the midwest

Commercialism. [from Southern Bubba, Ph.D.]

It's early Wednesday morning and I'm drunk now, so what do I know?  But a friend of mine at a nearby college asked me to informally observe one of his classes a few days ago and "grill" him about how he does things.  He wanted candid feedback from a trusted friend, not the official, useless bureaucratic shit from his supervisor.  So I sat in on one of his classes and then also picked his brain about how he runs the class and interacts with the students.  He's my friend and he was flexible and so I found it to be kind of fun.  He bought me lunch.  Fuck it, you know?

There were a number of issues.  Infinite stuff, both good and bad.  But this one thing sticks in my craw: the fucking commercialism.

Every goddamn powerpoint slide had some stylized trademark on it from a company (imagine that it was Pearson or Cengage or B&N Education or whatever).  Every slide.  I asked him later if the students were seeing these logos the entire semester, and he said they were.

The cherry on top is this question from a quiz the students took:

WTF.

The commercialism was oppressive.  I could not have answered this quiz question correctly.   It was a stupid question.  It might as well have been, "When is it a good idea to drink Coca-Cola or rent a car from Hertz?"

Why is a college forcing its students to answer questions like this?  And then grading them based on whether or not they got the answer "right" or "wrong"?

When is it a good idea to use Google when writing a paper?  How about "NEVER"?  I prefer other search engines that prioritize privacy and use different algorithms.

And what about the fucking pursuit of truth?  Do we really need stockholders looking over our shoulders in the classroom, making sure that we push their products on our students the same way the football team pushes Nike or Adidas?

Is it all just about money?

Can higher education not be a public good at all?

Fuck it.

--Southern Bubba, Ph.D.

Monday Magic in November

What's your favorite thing about college?  

Thanksgiving Meals

Transgender Day of Remembrance at Arizona State University

On Transgender Day of Remembrance, the Rainbow Community at Arizona State University hosted a visual commemoration of the 22 people worldwide who have lost their lives due to transphobic violence.

Now that Thanksgiving is Nearly Upon Us, by Froderick Frankenstien from Fresno

Now that Thanksgiving is nearly upon us, it’s good to think about explaining to non-academic relatives what we do. Ever notice how, after your second year of grad school, they start asking, “Are you STILL in grad school?”

Even then, most relatives will think it takes only four years after your bachelors to get a Ph.D. That’s what they read in their 1968 World Book Encyclopedia, after all, and it’s still on the shelf. They will wonder, often aloud, what’s wrong with you if it takes longer.

They may not wonder this as much if your work takes you around the world. During my grad student and postdoc years my relatives invariably said, “Oooo!” whenever I did field work in Chile and Australia. They also said, “Oooo!” when I went to conferences in Venice and Oxford. The more remote and exotic the locales for field work, the better. Hawai’i is perfect. The more civilized and sophisticated the locales for conferences, the better. Schenectady does not cut it.

Going to Washington, DC will make them wonder whether you’ll be advising the White House or Congress. They’ll like that, no matter who’s occupying them. Telling them that you’re going to NASA or NSF headquarters will be just as good. Don’t point out how badly funded they are. Don’t point out how squalid DC is. The more colorful your stories about the Atacama Desert or the Outback, however, the better.

Don't tell them how bad the academic job market is, or how rare permanent jobs have become. It won't gain you sympathy. The new economy has made “real” jobs of all kinds rare, inside and outside of academia. Never use the word “grant.” In their minds, that’s for entitled freeloaders.

Never say, “postdoc.” Relatives don’t know what that is, and don’t respond well to it. They think that once you finish your Ph.D. you’ll immediately become a professor. That’s the way it did work before 1969. Tell them you’re a research scientist: that sounds like a real job to them. Never grumble about the lousy funding situation. If you do, they’ll remind you that they pay enough tax dollars already.

Never say, “Visiting Assistant Professor.” Tell them you’re teaching. Surprisingly often, whenever relatives ask what you’re doing, they will regard your answer of “teaching” as a satisfactory answer. That is a real job, isn’t it? If you have any K-12 teachers in the family, it will make them very happy. It helps if at least one of your courses is something practical, such as physics to engineers so bridges won’t fall down, or electricity.

Once you have your Ph.D., relatives will volunteer you to pop over to their kids’ schools to give talks. I’ve learned a lot from this. This Thanksgiving, I will diplomatically try to avoid it, since during the day after a California-to-New York overnight flight, I’m not looking or feeling my best.

You gain a lot of credibility if, as an academic, you can still do something practical, such as fix a relative’s computer or car. NOTHING beats bringing home a charming, intelligent significant other. I told everyone she was the finest mathematician I’d ever seen, because it was true. It was suggested that she help the kids with their arithmetic homework, but mercifully the kids were having none of it. If Mom tries to convert her to Christianity, change the subject.

--Froderick Frankenstien from Fresno

Rising number of college students report mental health condition [UMN News]

The flava:
The number of students coming to college with a mental health condition continues to increase, with nearly half of all female students reporting a diagnosis in their lifetime. The 2018 College Student Health Survey of University of Minnesota Twin Cities (UMTC) students found a 29 percent increase in mental health conditions among students since 2015.

The article:
https://twin-cities.umn.edu/news-events/rising-number-college-students-report-mental-health-condition

Moriarty from Midland's Dean says, "I'll get back to you."

I reported some disturbing news to my dean this morning, appealing for a quick and ethical resolution.

"I'll get back to you," replied my dean to me.

I'm not holding my breath.

--Moriarty from Midland

Duke University to settle case alleging researchers used fraudulent data to win millions in grants [sciencemag.org]

The flava:
Duke University in Durham, North Carolina, is on the verge of settling a case brought by a former employee who claims the university included faked data in applications and reports for federal grants worth nearly $200 million.

According to court documents filed last week in the Middle District of North Carolina in Greensboro, former Duke biologist Joseph Thomas, who sued the university in 2015 under a federal law that allows whistleblowers to receive as much as 30% of any payout, is waiting for the U.S. Department of Justice to approve the settlement. Thomas brought his case under the federal False Claims Act (FCA), which could force Duke to return to the government up to three times the amount of any ill-gotten funds.

The article:
https://www.sciencemag.org/news/2018/11/duke-university-settle-case-alleging-researchers-used-fraudulent-data-win-millions

Michael Bloomberg: Why I’m Giving $1.8 Billion for College Financial Aid [nytimes]

"I am donating an additional $1.8 billion to Hopkins that will be used for financial aid for qualified low- and middle-income students.  This will make admissions at Hopkins forever need-blind; finances will never again factor into decisions."

https://www.nytimes.com/2018/11/18/opinion/bloomberg-college-donation-financial-aid.html

:)

There once was a girl named Irene
Who lived on distilled kerosene
But she started absorbin'
A new hydrocarbon
And since then has never benzene.

Family Sues University Where 20-Year-Old Daughter Died in a Pancake Eating Contest [people.com]

The flava:
Over a year after 20-year-old Sacred Heart University student Caitlin Nelson died from choking in a charity pancake-eating contest on campus, her family is suing the school for her alleged wrongful death.

Rosanne Nelson filed a lawsuit against Sacred Heart University on Monday in Superior Court in Bridgeport, Connecticut over the death of her daughter.

The lawsuit alleges that Sacred Heart was at fault for allowing the pancake-eating contest to happen, claiming that the university “failed to investigate the safety of a pancake eating contest before granting approval” and did not have “adequate and appropriate medical personnel” who could respond to a choking at the contest. . . .

The article:
https://people.com/food/caitlin-nelson-death-sacred-heart-university-pancake-eating-contest-lawsuit/

Monday Magic in October

"People who had experienced one or more traumas in their lives were more likely to report health problems if they did not confide in others about their traumas than if they had done so (e.g., Pennebaker & Susman, 1988). The inhibition idea was that the act of inhibiting or in some way holding back thoughts, emotions, or behaviors is associated with low level physiological work – much the way that Sapolsky (2004) or Selye (1978) thought about stress. Further, people were especially likely to inhibit their thoughts and feelings about traumatic experiences that were socially threatening. Hence, individuals who had experienced a sexual trauma would be far less likely to talk about it with others than if they had experienced the death of a grandparent. . . ."

"Traumas"
E.g., administrators, students, colleagues, vendors, the state legislature, Pearson, Cengage, Barnes & Noble Education, the athletic department, fraternities, sororities. . . .

What to do about it?  Ideas?

"Everyone, hug those you love today."

The flava:
Lauren McCluskey was walking home from a Monday night class at the University of Utah while chatting with her mother on the phone, when her mother heard her yell, "No, no, no!"

"That was the last I heard from her," Jill McCluskey said in an emailed statement Tuesday.

The article:
https://www.ksl.com/article/46412459/that-was-the-last-i-heard-from-her-family-of-u-student-slain-on-campus-speaks-out

12 Authors Write About the Libraries They Love [nytimes.com]

"For most readers and writers — and book lovers in general — the library holds a special place of honor and respect. We asked several authors to tell us about their local public library or to share a memory of a library from their past. . . ."

University of Iowa Cites Alcohol in Suspending 9 Frats [usnews.com]

The flava:
University of Iowa officials say they've temporarily suspended nine fraternities for incidents with alcohol.

The chapters suspended Wednesday pending further investigation are accused of violating a university moratorium on alcohol at fraternity and sorority parties. The nine are: Pi Kappa Alpha, Beta Theta Pi, Pi Kappi Phi, Acacia, Sigma Pi, Phi Delta Theta, Sigma Phi Epsilon, Sigma Alpha Epsilon and Delta Chi.

University vice president Melissa Shivers says "the blatant and systemic failure to curb holding dangerous open events with alcohol, including tailgates, will stop." 

The article:
https://www.usnews.com/news/best-states/iowa/articles/2018-10-11/university-of-iowa-cites-alcohol-in-suspending-9-frats

Suspended Badger Quintez Cephus sues university officials over the timing of disciplinary action [Milwaukee Journal Sentinel]

The flava:
Suspended Badgers wide receiver Quintez Cephus has sued the University of Wisconsin to try to stop an expected expulsion over a sexual encounter with two students in April. . . . The officials forced Cephus "into the predicament of having to either waive his Fifth Amendment right against self-incrimination by choosing to participate in the University process despite the potential harm to his criminal defense, or decline to participate in the University’s process thus leading to the inevitable finding of responsibility and severe sanctions," the suit states.

The article:
https://www.jsonline.com/story/sports/college/uw/2018/10/11/quintez-cephus-suspended-uw-receiver-sues-university-wisconsin/1587980002/

Reuters Top 100: The World's Most Innovative Universities - 2018

"For the fourth year running, Stanford University tops Reuters’ ranking of the World’s Most Innovative Universities, a list that . . . was compiled in partnership with Clarivate Analytics, and is based on proprietary data and analysis of numerous indicators including patent filings and research paper citations."

TOP 100 UNIVERSITIES | 2018 RANKINGS
1 Stanford University, USA
2 Massachusetts Institute of Technology (MIT), USA
3 Harvard University, USA
4 University of Pennsylvania, USA
5 University of Washington, USA
6 University of Texas System, USA
7 KU Leuven, Belgium
8 Imperial College London, United Kingdom
9 University of North Carolina Chapel Hill, USA
10 Vanderbilt University, USA
11 Korea Advanced Institute of Science & Technology (KAIST), South Korea
12 Federal Institute of Technology in Lausanne (EPFL), Switzerland
13 Pohang University of Science & Technology (POSTECH), South Korea
14 University of California System, USA
15 University of Southern California, USA
16 Cornell University, USA
17 Duke University, USA
18 University of Cambridge, United Kingdom
19 Johns Hopkins University, USA
20 University of Tokyo, Japan
21 California Institute of Technology, USA
22 Osaka University, Japan
23 University of Michigan System, USA
24 Northwestern University, USA
25 University of Wisconsin System, USA
26 Kyoto University, Japan
27 University of Minnesota System, USA
28 University of Illinois System, USA
29 Georgia Institute of Technology, USA
30 University of Utah, USA
31 University of Erlangen Nuremberg, Germany
32 Ohio State University, USA
33 Columbia University, USA
34 Seoul National University, South Korea
35 University of Toronto, Canada
36 Tohoku University, Japan
37 University of Pittsburgh, USA
38 Yale University, USA
39 Sungkyunkwan University, South Korea
40 University of Oxford, United Kingdom
41 University of Colorado System, USA
42 Tufts University, USA
43 Baylor College of Medicine, USA
44 Tsinghua University, China
45 Technical University of Munich, Germany
46 Kyushu University, Japan
47 Tokyo Institute of Technology, Japan
48 University College London, United Kingdom
49 Swiss Federal Institute of Technology Zurich, Switzerland
50 Purdue University System, USA
51 University of Chicago, USA
52 Oregon Health & Science University, USA
53 University of Manchester, United Kingdom
54 Indiana University System, USA
55 University of Montpellier, France
56 University of Munich, Germany
57 Technical University of Denmark, Denmark
58 Emory University, USA
59 Peking University, China
60 Sorbonne University, France
61 University of British Columbia, Canada
62 Delft University of Technology, Netherlands
63 National University of Singapore, Singapore
64 Princeton University, USA
65 University of Zurich, Switzerland
66 Hanyang University, South Korea
67 Case Western Reserve University, USA
68 Yonsei University, South Korea
69 Rutgers State University New Brunswick, USA
70 Boston University, USA
71 University of Massachusetts System, USA
72 Johannes Gutenberg University of Mainz, Germany
73 Wake Forest University, USA
74 Keio University, Japan
75 Korea University, South Korea
76 University of Florida, USA
77 Leiden University, Netherlands
78 University of Paris Descartes - Paris 5, France
79 Hebrew University of Jerusalem, Israel
80 University of Cincinnati, USA
81 University of Freiburg, Germany
82 Ruprecht Karl University Heidelberg, Germany
83 State University of New York System, USA
84 University of Claude Bernard - Lyon 1, France
85 University of Virginia, USA
86 Dresden University of Technology, Germany
87 University of Iowa, USA
88 Ghent University, Belgium
89 Shanghai Jiao Tong University, China
90 Hokkaido University, Japan
91 Tel Aviv University, Israel
92 Karlsruhe Institute of Technology, Germany
93 Zhejiang University, China
94 Fudan University, China
95 University of Miami, USA
96 Arizona State University, USA
97 University of Paris Sud - Paris 11, France
98 Gwangju Institute of Science & Technology, South Korea
99 Nagoya University, Japan
100 Free University of Berlin, Germany

When was the last time you signed a petition? Or called your senator?

More than 2,400 law professors signed a letter opposing Brett Kavanaugh’s Supreme Court confirmation, stating "that he did not display the impartiality and judicial temperament requisite to sit on the highest court of our land."
https://www.nytimes.com/interactive/2018/10/03/opinion/kavanaugh-law-professors-letter.html

UW researcher wins $625,000 MacArthur ‘genius grant’ for transgender youth study [The Seattle Times]

The flava:
A University of Washington researcher has been named a winner of this year’s John D. and Catherine T. MacArthur Foundation fellowship, commonly dubbed the “genius grant.”

Kristina Olson, 37, was one of 25 fellows selected by the foundation, which announced the winners Thursday. Each of the fellows will receive a $625,000 “no-strings-attached” grant “to exercise their own creative instincts for the benefit of human society,” the announcement said.

Olson is a research psychologist who was nominated for her ongoing study of transgender youth who are supported by their parents or guardians to live their preferred gender.

The article:
https://www.seattletimes.com/seattle-news/uw-researcher-awarded-macarthur-fellowship-for-transgender-youth-study/

Reproach [The Harvard Crimson]

The flava:
We ask that Kavanaugh’s upcoming appointment as a law school lecturer be suspended pending a review of the serious allegations against him. For better or for worse, decisions made at Harvard fall under the national spotlight. Let us be a voice for survivors, not perpetrators. If the University has reason to believe that Kavanaugh was culpable of sexual assault, we believe that accepting him onto our campus would be an insult to survivors within our own community. Harvard must clearly demonstrate that it prioritizes their needs, believes their experiences, and will fight for their safety.

The article:
https://www.thecrimson.com/article/2018/9/27/editorial-harvard-should-tread-carefully-with-kavanaugh/

I couldn't believe it myself...you'd think I was making it up... [from Canadian Crotchety Crank]

In a world of supposed 'Digital Natives', this month I've come across two students new to post-secondary that,

• despite completing the required online enrollment and 
• initializing their institutional email and
• accessing the institutional courseware system

did not / will not / don't look at their 'school' email.

Why? They say just prefer to use their personal email account.

No problem right?            Wrong.

As I was helping each navigate this new term's expectations, all of which I'd shared via school email, we (each student and I) discovered that they were in danger of being unenrolled from their courses because of loan/fee/payment issues... issues that the Registrar had communicated to them, VIA SCHOOL EMAIL.

Needless to say, they were shocked and embarrassed, and we stopped working on the course communications and I sent them off to speak F-2-F with those that could 'fix' their $$ issues.

I will ask them later, if they have 'Googled' how to set up the their school email to automatically forward missives to their personal email.

Oh me.

--Canadian Crotchety Crank

Monday Magic in September

The number of international students in U.S. colleges hit its peak (approximately 900,000) during President Obama's last year in office.  There are different methods for estimating the number, but it seems to have been decreasing since then.

What's your favorite anecdote about an international student?  Do you wish your college had more of them?

Moriarty from Midland sends in another statement

After a committee meeting Friday during which my dean endorsed the President's statement that, "I have no doubt that, if the attack on Dr. Ford was as bad as she says, charges would have been immediately filed with local Law Enforcement Authorities...." . . . I just felt sick.  I no longer believe that higher education in America is about pursuing truth, social justice, or making the world better.   It's about something else.

--Moriarty from Midland

Mis-sold, expensive and overhyped: why our universities are a con [The Guardian]

The flava:
They are making one of the biggest purchases of their lives, shelling out more on tuition fees and living expenses than one might on a sleek new Mercedes, or a deposit on a London flat. Many will emerge with a costly degree that fulfills few of the promises made in those glossy prospectuses. If mis-selling is the flogging of a pricey product with not a jot of concern about its suitability for the buyer, then that is how the establishment in politics and in higher education now treat university degrees. The result is that tens of thousands of young graduates begin their careers having already been swindled as soundly as the millions whose credit card companies foisted useless payment protection insurance on them.

The article:
https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2018/sep/20/university-factory-failed-tony-blair-social-mobility-jobs

weekend levity

"Professor whats his nuts"

A pair of polls, from Wombat of the Copier

Can people teach a college course if they themselves are incapable of passing said course?

a) Yes, give everyone an answer key and they can read it out loud in class like the 1800s when teachers were whoever the fuck the town council hired to teach whether they knew the subject or not.

b) Yes, but don't give anyone an answer key until after you've told them 14 times "I prefer you try the questions on your own first so you are fully prepared not just to check answers, but help students solve the problems during class" - incompetence is fine as long as they're tenacious.

c) Of course fucking not!  If they're already stymied converting inches to centimeters without a god damned answer key then the students are surely going to be super fucked by the time they're doing redox-titrations.

I was an adjunct elsewhere for a decade and never even thought to ask for an answer key, let alone did I ever receive one.  A new adjunct at one of the former institutions once complained that we didn't get answer keys and we all looked at her like she was fucking nuts.  Here I say "make your own but if a question stumps you, it may be poorly worded so ask me and I'll help you with it" and everyone looks at me like I'm fucking nuts.

Ok - that was the catharsis poll, now for the developmental poll:

How can I recruit better instructors?

--WotC

"brief screed" from Southern Bubba, Ph.D.

I'm so drunk and maybe I will regret having submitted this very brief screed to you, but I feel so strongly right now that 95% (or so) of the employees at my school are just eking out an existence.  I'm not destitute myself, but there's something about the bitterness and struggle being so perilously close at all times and palpably feeling the desperation and anxiety.  We live in this world in which twentysomethings are "self-made" billionaires.  Mon dieu.  POTUS seems so utterly unconcerned about handing over money and intellectual property to Russia, China, etc. . . . Pearson, BlackBoard, Canvas, and the others hold so much sway on campuses.  I wonder how the adjuncts cannot or do not foment an uprising.  Every day is mind-boggling.  There seem to be more liars than ever.  It just seems like something's going to snap.

--Southern Bubba, Ph.D.

the difficulty

"Reading both social media and blog conversations among philosophers, I often feel demoralized.  The people who speak most and most insistently seem not only to be absolutely clear about what they think, but think there is no other legitimate, respectable, or even moral way to think."
--Amy Olberding

"I now think that online discussions of difficult issues tend to do more harm than good."
--Jennifer Mather Saul

"There's zero correlation between being the best talker and having the best ideas."
--Susan Cain

"The only thing I know is that I know nothing."
--Socrates

at the very tail end of Labor Day in the U.S. . . .

Are you a laborer?

Are you fortunate enough to have supervisors not abusing their power over you?

Want to share?

Arbitrating the Use of Student Evaluations of Teaching [insidehighered.com]

The flava:
An arbitrator ordered Ryerson University in Canada to amend its faculty collective bargaining agreement to ensure that student evaluations of teaching (SETs) are not used to measure teaching effectiveness for promotion or tenure.

The article:
https://www.insidehighered.com/quicktakes/2018/08/31/arbitrating-use-student-evaluations-teaching

In Which Bella Advises That-a-Boy Greg---and Greg's Dad

I worked in the advising office all summer.  I enjoyed it.  I harbor a secret fantasy to somehow make my way over to the student services side.  As the summer waned, a desperation tainted the air, particularly for students coming in with their parents.  It was during this time that Greg and Greg's Dad came in to see me.

Greg was quiet and let Dad do all the talking for the most part. I gave Greg my FERPA speech, making sure I had his permission to talk about his academic life with his Dad present.  He was amused by this. Then Dad jumped right in.  "Greg is only here to get his GPA back up," Dad explained.  "He's majoring in Manufacturing Engineering at State U.  But he had some trouble with his courses, both at State U and Fancy Pants U, the first place Greg attended, and now he needs to get his GPA up before State U will let him back in."  Greg's Dad had done a lot of homework ahead of our meeting:  "I've looked into the classes you offer that most closely match the manufacturing engineering courses he'll need for State."  He handed me a page on which he had taken copious notes and made a list of courses.  "Here they are---these are the ones he needs."

Greg's dad had picked out courses from our one-year Advanced Manufacturing Program.  We got a huge grant to create it, and it's always full.  Graduates are guaranteed job placement---and they make great money.  I'm considering doing it!  Here's the thing:  none of those courses are offered "piecemeal"----they are very expensive to offer and they are offered only to the people in the year-long program (and are always full).  They are for the sole purpose of providing our state with graduates who can go work in the manufacturing field.  The businesses who need such people here are desperate.

Greg was playing a lot with his phone. He seemed uncomfortable and annoyed with his dad, but he was good-natured about it.  I explained to them both how the manufacturing courses were only for that program, and Dad jumped in, cutting me off "I KNOW THAT!  I READ THE PROGRAM DESCRIPTION!"

I told Greg about the program---how it has 100% job placement, and the salary.  Greg was looking me in the eye, listening.  "NO!" shouted Dad.  "That program is NOT for managers!  Greg is going directly into management!"

At this point, Dad had to take a call.  I pointed out to Greg that his State U program would also be requiring him to take either Macro or Micro Economics.  He had me explain the difference, and he told me he thought Macro would be more interesting.  Dad, still on the phone, heard that sign of interest and shouted "That a Boy, Greg!" thumping the back of Greg's chair.  With Dad still on the phone, I told Greg about how the math required at state was also required in our Manufacturing Program.  Greg told me he liked math, and I told him people in manufacturing had to be great at math nowadays.  I slipped him a flyer about our program.

Dad got off the phone, and we managed to sign Greg up for Macro and his next math class. And I sent them on their way with all the good wishes in the world for That-a-Boy Greg.

--Bella

the movies

Back-to-School Advice for College Trustees [Wall Street Journal]

https://www.wsj.com/articles/back-to-school-advice-for-college-trustees-1535149878

Monday Magic in August

Why are you not happy the school year is beginning?

And can you find a way to make it better?

"Alexa, will this be on the test?"

Saint Louis University is putting an Echo Dot in every dorm room and campus apartment.

https://www.cnet.com/news/amazons-alexa-is-going-to-college/

Once at Center of Yale Protests, Professor Wins the School’s Highest Honor [nytimes.com]

https://www.nytimes.com/2018/08/14/nyregion/yale-professor-protests-christakis-honored-sterling.html

What is it like to be a grad student? by Froderick Frankenstien from Fresno

The new school year is about to start. I was just checking the room that my Department of Physics makes available for graduate students. On the wall is a poster of John Belushi from “Animal House.” He is wearing a shirt that says “COLLEGE”. Most college professors and many professional scientists like me went to graduate school. What is it like to be a grad student?

Being a graduate student is like being in college, in some ways. It’s mostly different, in other ways. Fun and games make up much less of it, unless you consider doing lots of reading and homework fun---and you might, in order to have become a grad student in the first place. It’s much more professional: you’re doing a job, and you're conscious of it.

It can be heady to be playing with the big kids at last. But then, as Groucho Marx noted, “I love my cigar, too, but I take it out of my mouth once in a while.” Some graduate courses, especially ones with nicknames such as “Jackson e&m,” inspire a feeling of shared adversity among grad students. Notice that no one calls the course by its actual name, "Classical Electrodynamics": they refer to it by the name of the author of the famous textbook, noted for its difficulty, especially of its homework problems. When you meet classmates again in later life, you can feel the camaraderie of heroes, years after the war. And of course, that's the class where you really learn how to be a professional scientist. Most grad students are over 21, and so can legally drink, unlike in most of college. Most grad students don’t have time for drinking, though.

Many grad students also do their first teaching, often as teaching assistants running labs for undergraduates. There is no more rewarding profession than being a teacher, but it’s not all fun. Your students look very different from the other side of the classroom. A great disappointment can be just how mean, childish, and seemingly deliberately stupid some of your students can be. Some of them act like outright weenies, one reason being they surmise you are not much older or different from them, and therefore are vulnerable. Complaining about student misconduct far too often gets a response of “Don’t spend so much time teaching” from faculty. This is because a department that has graduate students probably wants them primarily to help in research, on which faculty often are judged exclusively.

Some old professors say, “Enjoy your time in grad school. They’re the best years of your career!” This struck me much like the old state trooper at the driver license office who would say, “Enjoy your time in high school. They’re the best years of your life!” It always good to enjoy any time in your life, but if that’s the best you can do, you’ve had a dull career or life.

--Froderick Frankenstien from Fresno

Oh boy, here we go. [from Frankie Bow]

Imagine you're a propagandist, hired to drum up outrage against the humanities. Or tenure. Or academia. Or all of the above. Could you do any better than this?

"In this age of grade inflation, student entitlements, skyrocketing tuitions, and rampant anti-intellectualism, my wallowing in the pleasures of giving out A’s as if they were $100 bills might seem like ammunition for the enemies of higher education and the professorial life. In the face of that charge, I have only one response: I’m tenured."

Expecting some kind of sly rhetorical trick, where the writer reveals halfway through that his real point is something completely different and entirely reasonable, and he's not simply bragging about handing out A's like candy because it's easy and fun and makes students like him? Yeah, that would have been nice.

"I love giving A’s to students, maybe even more than they love receiving them... I’ve acquired a reputation as an "easy" teacher, and I love that, too.... So part of my plan is to try to show love and empathy rather than contempt and derision, as some of my colleagues do."

Contempt and derision, you say?

"Hell, students already have enough stress and uncertainty in their lives as they adjust to living on their own, making new friends, feeding themselves, and taking crazy-making courses on "orgo" (that’s organic chemistry, I think)"

You tell 'em, Professor Santapants! You neither know nor care what  your colleagues are teaching but you know they're doing it wrong and anyway what is chemistry LOL 

Go on, read the whole thing. Misery loves company, and it's not behind a paywall.

https://www.chronicle.com/article/Why-Im-Easy-On-Giving-Lots/244144

--Frankie Bow 

FAMU law grad first professor in Florida to teach a cannabis law course [The Famuan]

The flava:
Professor and lawyer by day, wife and mother by night. Tameika Range continues to raise the bar for excellence higher and higher.

The FAMU College of Law in Orlando has made history as the state’s first institution of higher learning to offer a cannabis law and social justice course, thanks to Range.

The article:
http://www.thefamuanonline.com/news/view.php/1034197/-FAMU-law-grad-first-professor-in-Florid