update from Fab

I've asked Bubba to close this site so I can restart the old one. Except we are going to call it CollegeMizery. We start Saturday, April 1. Here is the new front page. And memberships are $9.

From Frankie Bow: When a student doesn't “like to be told what words [she] may and may not use, ever.”

Student turns in a paper that doesn't fulfill the assignment, gets a bad grade, sues the university. 

In an email exchange with the department chair, she declared that she didn’t “like to be told what words [she] may and may not use, ever.”

For the time being, the university has prevailed.

The story reminded me of a student I had a while back who, before the semester started, threatened to
sue professors who had cell phone bans on their syllabi. He had his side business from his cell phone, you see, and it was apparently of vital importance that he stay connected at all times. To forbid him that lifeline was, in his words, "financial discrimination" or some such thing.

After consulting with our administration and being assured that in case of a lawsuit, he would be left to twist in the wind, one colleague removed the no-cell-phones policy from his syllabus.

I left mine in, and marked the student down for using his phone during a closed-book quiz.

This did not affect his final grade, as the deducted points would have moved him from a low C to a high C.

No matter.

The student filed a grievance against me after grades were turned in; my students reported to me that he was telling his classmates and my colleagues how he was confident that he was going to "take me down."

The grievance did not go his way, but the process made my semester rather unpleasant.

What's your pathologically-entitled-student (/colleague/administrator/staff member/trustee) story?  

--Frankie Bow

Speedy Exchange, from Wombat of the Copier

Student:  When are your office hours? I would like to discuss my grade.

WotC:   I can't fucking believe I have literally announced my office hours at the start and end of every fucking class for the last 5 fucking classes and you actually just fucking asked me this, but ok, they are W, X, Y & Z.  But if you just want to discuss your grade, that's not something that requires office hours, we can do it via e-mail. I'll go first:  What I like about your grade is that it's a 2 digit prime number, both digits of which are also prime.  What I don't like about it is that neither digit is a 7. I think it would have been so much cooler if one of the digits was a 7.  Ok, that's enough from me, your turn.  What are your thoughts about your grade?  I love discussions, don't you?

(potentially) free book

Yesterday, Inside Higher Ed published an interview with the authors of a book about "the soul of the university."  That reminded me of another book with a similar title--"In the Company of Scholars: The Struggle for the Soul of Higher Education," by Julius Getman--which was well-received by some.

So we're giving away a brand new copy of Getman's book.  Hard copy.  Mint condition.  Never been opened.  Never been touched by human hands.  And you might be wondering how someone could have a brand-spanking-new copy of a book that was published 25 years ago. . . .

Just guess what you think will be the highest number in the April 5 Lotto Texas drawing.  (For example, on March 25, the highest number was 48.)  You'll receive the book FREE if your guess is the closest to the actual highest number in the drawing on April 5.  Just put your guess in the comments below.

Terms and conditions may apply.  For example, I reserve the right to void this whole thing if there's a tie between two people, so just don't guess what someone else guessed.  Also, this is only open to people/personas/avatars who clearly have previously posted or commented in one of the RYS progeny blogs.  And if someone outside the U.S. wins, this book is getting shipped to your best friend in the states.

Let the games begin!  Or, alternatively, you may choose not to participate if you want to make the author feel bad.  You have choices.

Sincerely,
Real Gosh-darned Moderator

P.s.  Experts predict that you are 973 times more likely to win this book than to win a gift card from Pearson.

Textbook Yuks

The two cultures (a variation on the theme)

Free college on the inside.

Expensive college on the outside.

Almost makes a person want to get incarcerated.

NPR, at it again.

Hopeful, Idealistic, Monday Magic

If you could wave a magic wand and make today the ideal day at your school, what would be most noticeably different from last week?

"College is the great leveler of American life, and the great divider, too." (NYTimes)

Article in the New York Times

by Anemona Hartocollis

about students

named

TaTy’Terria Gary

Nate Triggs

Zac Shaner

"College is great."

“College is my, like, Plan B.”

"College feels borderline out of reach."

The link to the article.

Fab Memes it Up!

Uggy from Utica sends in a speedy rant

only worth feeding children if they ace their standardized tests


Mulvaney has the same attitude as DeVos and Trump: schools and universities aren't here for public service. Public schools are
dumping grounds for kids who landed on the Got To Go list at Success Academy. Why spend guv'mint money on unprofitable kids?

Tirebiter Submits the Stream, by George Leroy Tirebiter XII

I have a lot of random stuff chasing me today, so I’m experimenting with an old College Misery literary device: the “stream.”

• I’m on a subcommittee on Diversity, Inclusion and Tolerance. I think we just decided that these things are good.
• We’re considering weekly yoga/health and mindfulness in the department. I think we’ve also decided that health and mindfulness are good.
• I’m not calling the guy “Drumpf.” I just won’t. Yes, I firmly believe that he’s all kinds of mean, incompetent, and possibly traitorous, but he has a name, and there’s no reason I can see not to use it. People who say “Drumpf” just remind me of this doofus who buzzed around the Chronicle comments section referring to President Obama as “Barry.” It’s like making fun of somebody by drawing a picture of them picking their nose or something. Not sure I can call him “45,” either—I can’t see any point there. There are many valuable and intelligent ways to mock, anger, and humiliate President Trump, and we should use as many of them as we can. But he is President Trump for now, and that’s the way things are.
• I’ve been seeing my own death in my head a lot lately—usually I see it happening while I’m chasing my kids, just dropping dead in mid-stride or mid-stumble. I think I’m okay with it.
• A student interviewed me today, and one of the questions was, “What got you into teaching?” For a few seconds, I couldn’t answer. For me, I finally said, it had to do with two things. One is kind of like the feeling you get sometimes when you’re talking about something you’re really enthusiastic about—and then getting the chance to do that several days a week. The other is that moment when the light bulb turns on (or the candle gets lit) for a student—you can see it in their faces sometimes. And, cliché and all, it really does make up for weeks of frustration with a shot of numbness. 
• Go-to fun moment: toss-up between Maui singing “You’re Welcome” and Princess Poppy singing “I’m Not Giving Up Today.”

Tirebiter out.

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To complete our brief survey, please click here. 

Once you complete the survey, you will be entered into a drawing to win one of TEN $100 American Express gift cards*. Thank you in advance for your feedback. We look forward to hearing from you soon. 

Sincerely,

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News from Fab!

In Which Bella Observes Even More Proof that EdDs are Absolutely Worthless.

In Fact, Bella has decided they have negative worth.

So, Shaquille O'Neal, proud recipient of an EdD from Barry U in Florida, has declared that the earth is flat.  Here's a quote from Dr. O'Neal as reported in Yahoo News (yes, I admit I succumbed to click bait on this one!): "It’s true. The Earth is flat. The Earth is flat. Yes, it is. Listen, there are three ways to manipulate the mind — what you read, what you see and what you hear. In school, first thing they teach us is, ‘Oh, Columbus discovered America,’ but when he got there, there were some fair-skinned people with the long hair smoking on the peace pipes. So, what does that tell you? Columbus didn’t discover America. So, listen, I drive from coast to coast, and this s*** is flat to me. I’m just saying. I drive from Florida to California all the time, and it’s flat to me. I do not go up and down at a 360-degree angle, and all that stuff about gravity, have you looked outside Atlanta lately and seen all these buildings? You mean to tell me that China is under us? China is under us? It’s not. The world is flat."

I am not surprised that Shaquille O'Neal is a big tall idiot.  But I am surprised, even though I shouldn't be, that someone could earn a doctorate-level degree from any accredited institution of learning and be able to rate this low on the intelligence/common sense/basic-human-survival-needs scale.

It puts a whole new sense of urgency on the need to fight grade inflation.

Happy trails!

Bella

Trump doesn’t realize that America’s greatest export is higher education (Quartz)

The flava:
"Financially- and academically-capable international students are essential to the health of US higher education. And we have room for many, many more. International enrollments comprise less than 5% of all students in the US, compared to 25% in Australia where the government has promoted foreign student enrollment to boost the economy."

The link to the article:

https://qz.com/930634/trumps-travel-ban-would-harm-americas-greatest-export-higher-education/

(UK) plan to crack down on student "outsourcing"

The Guardian has a recent article on plans to crack down on sites that offer to complete students' academic work, for a fee.  Flava:

Thomas Lancaster, an associate dean at Staffordshire University and one of the UK’s leading experts on essay cheating, said that while universities had anti-plagiarism software to detect copying of academic texts, they could not prevent the process of contract cheating, where students employ ghostwriters to complete new assignments.

“We think this is a substantial problem affecting universities, that students can go and pay other people to do their assignments for them,” he said.

I'm honestly not sure how common a problem this is at my university. Most of our students are pretty cash-strapped, which makes it seem unlikely that they have the money to spend on this sort of thing, especially for the sort of assignments I create (very particular requirements, lots of required scaffolding/preparatory steps, required detailed interaction with other students' work in online classes).  But a few might try, especially in classes in which they feel particularly at sea (e.g. my writing class for students with mostly technical skills/inclinations).

Are any of you seeing much of this sort of cheating? If so, have you identified any red flags that signal its possible/likely presence?  

Big Hungry

I have two iPhones, an iPad, an iPod, a MacBook, a desktop, and several other internet-connected things.  They let me do lots of things that someone a hundred years ago would have had to have hired numerous people to do.  In this competitive environment, I don't feel like I can afford not to use the technology.  Lots of wealthy and knowledgeable people know the technology is putting people out of work and will continue to do so--and this has led some of them to espouse universal basic income.

I'm sorry the technology is putting many people out of work.  It hurts me, too, on that front.  It is an enormous fucking challenge.  I'm in there struggling and desperately hoping not to be totally outsourced to the bots myself--to the MOOCs or apps or AI or whatever will one day take over my job.

That said. . . .

What's the app or software you use to make yourself a more productive and better proffie (or just a better person)?

Early Thirsty

I'm drunk.  I had a lot of bourbon last night (or this morning, or whatever).  I'm not crying now, but I had quite a good cry.  I haven't done either of those things in at least a month.  I'm thinking maybe I should schedule in once a month to get drunk.  It is sad that it may have come to this--like those married couples who schedule periodic sex.  But the alternative is not good.  I've been feeling like I might crack in half due to the stress.  I was briefly having chest pains last week.  I've just been keeping too much stress bottled up inside.  In years past, I would drink so much (so, so much) to relieve the stress.  But I've had real responsibilities with regard to taking care of my mom and doing my proffie job--and they have just simply precluded me from saying "Fuck It All" and getting drunk
for six hours or whatever.

What got me started drinking tonight?  What brought on this episode of grief and frustration and exhausted anger and feelings of desperation?  It wasn't my mom.  However stressful it is to care for a mostly-incapacitated person (with unspeakable challenges and all that), my preference would be to have the current state of affairs continue forever--because my mom is lovely and she makes my life feel more meaningful.

So it's not that.  It is the administrators who seem incapable of speaking truth.  Sometimes I wonder whether they even have any idea what is obviously right and wrong.  They rely more on superstition than on reason.  They remind me of the proponents of the GOP's healthcare bill--and how mindbogglingly gullible/moronic they seem to think the U.S. citizens are.  At best, the fucking administrators are so often like Al Gore--who when last night he was hawking his book (“The Assault on Reason") grinned and called Trump "one of a kind" and pretty much said nothing substantially negative about him.

It's hard having those in power relentlessly attempting to gaslight.  It's not like there have never before been Orwellian states or lying presidents.  But it's bad now.  It's absurd.

It doesn't have to be this way, does it?  I remember an administrator I once worked for who would spontaneously call me at random times just to say, "Hey, thanks for being here.  I really appreciate you."  Those were the days.

Q. Can you identify one administrator who has been wonderful, and why zhe was?

A. _________________________________

For-Profit Schools: Trump Delays Enforcing New Rules, Lifting Shares (Wall Street Journal)

The chart flava:

The WSJ story does not mention the University of Phoenix, Corinthian Colleges, or EDMC.

Compare, contrast, grimace, etc. . . .

link
link
and graphics

Speedy Rant, from Wombat of the Copier

Hey - girl who texts in the back of the 15-row lecture hall.. I honestly don't care if you text through the whole class OR get passive-aggressive in recitation, but it's one or the other, not both!  You can't text then huff "How are we supposed to know this?" for 90 minutes when you can't do any of the shit I spent 90 minutes doing for you right before lunch.  You know who isn't pissing in their panties right now?  The girls who sit in front and answered questions during class.  I know - I know - they're smarter than you or whatever your excuse is.  You know who ELSE is nailing the recitation quiz?  The kids who sit in the middle, and can't answer questions so they.... wait for it... wait for it.... ASK QUESTIONS!!!

So shut the fuck up.  Do yourself a favor and forget to pay your phone bill.  

Love, 

 WotC.  

#SXSWedu

Just a brief report, in order to vaguely maintain the tradition of reporting about conferences.  BONUS: This report has a few photos.

Next week, the sponsors for the glitzy, crazzzy SXSW will include alcoholic and energy drinks.  But SXSWedu is kind of the old schoolmarm cousin. Notice no beer amongst the sponsors----------------->

Fab was not there, but Chevron had a big booth with a faux chalkboard with Fab's name on it.  So big oil companies like Fab.  Who doesn't like Fab?











Here's a photo of 2,000 people watching Sara Goldrick-Rab talk.  But it seemed like everything she said has already been said at CM and RYS over the years, hasn't it?

There was a session in which about half of the attendees simultaneously stuck their phones up in the air to take photos of the speaker's powerpoint slide. Maybe about 40 of 80 total people in the room did that.

One of the best parts of the week was when I stumbled upon four Minerva students preparing for a session they had apparently organized.  I approached them because they just seemed like the most interesting people in the lobby.  And then I discovered that they were part of that rare species. (Only a few hundred people in the history of the world have ever been Minerva students.) Here's a photo of the two little cards they gave me:

While we were talking, six or seven of their classmates arrived with ice cream.  They were very friendly and willingly engaged in discussion with me for about twenty minutes.

I asked them what was the worst part about Minerva, and one of them replied that there was too much to do ("but in a good way").

I asked if the software they use for attending class ever malfunctions, and they replied that it does occasionally. They have a name for it: "tech days." But they said the "tech days" are essentially the equivalent of "snow days" at some other schools.

They genuinely seemed content with Minerva.  So I said, "But how can you know it's such a great school, if you've never attended another college?" And one of them pointed out that he had attended another college, and that he transferred in to Minerva and is glad he did. And he said he wasn't the only one who had transferred in.

They seemed like really decent, smart people, and they were so welcoming.  So, is Minerva "the future of college"?  Perhaps we'll know in twenty-five years.

That's it.  Please forgive the imperfectness of this report.  I didn't get any sleep last night.  Horses need sleep.

Your Real Gosh-darned Moderator,
Zooze the Horse

Pearson has a record loss, by Gina from Georgetown

Education publisher Pearson reports biggest loss in its history.

This raises two questions for me: 

1.  I am curious about everyone's experience with digital textbooks.  When I was forced to use one, the students were very resistant. They had a choice of buying access to the digital book or buying access to the digital book plus paying extra to get a bare bones printed version.  Nearly all them spent a little more to get the printed version.  They said they learn better with print.  These were under 30-year-olds.  Frankly, I was shocked!  I  thought the younger students would love the digital version and my older students would resist.  This was not the case; everyone resisted.

2.  Are faculty  who have a choice  in textbooks pushing back against choosing Pearson products because they have taken over so much of educational  publishing (textbooks, standardized testing in K-12,  the GED, etc.)?

Signed,

Gina from Georgetown

A Scuffle and a Professor's Injury Make Middlebury a Free-Speech Flashpoint. From the Crampicle.

In the wake of protests that disrupted a controversial speaker’s appearance and left a professor injured, Middlebury College has become the latest flashpoint in a national battle over campus speech and safety.

In a statement to the campus on Friday, Laurie L. Patton, the college’s president, described “a violent incident with a lot of pushing and shoving” as protesters swarmed Charles Murray, the speaker, and Allison Stanger, a professor who served as moderator, after the event. Ms. Patton apologized to Mr. Murray, Ms. Stanger, who was injured during the encounter, and “everyone who came in good faith to participate in a serious discussion.”

“We believe that many of these protesters were outside agitators, but there are indications that Middlebury College students were involved as well.” “Last night,” the president wrote, “we failed to live up to our core values.”

Even before it happened, Mr. Murray’s appearance had put those values on trial. Now the incident has stoked new debate — about whether the protesters were suppressing or exercising free speech, and about who was responsible for escalating the disruption into a fracas that sent Ms. Stanger to the hospital for treatment of an injury to her neck.

MORE

Monday Magic

If you could wave a magic wand and make today the ideal day at your school, what would be most
noticeably different from last week?

Big HUGE Hungry

If you removed the worst 20% of the faculty and the worst 20% of the administrators and the worst 20% of the students at your school, would you finally be happy?

Big, Big, Big, Big, Big, Big Thirsty

Which student do you remember most fondly?